* this content was written by me but originally published on Best Kept Self
This past weekend I had dinner with a friend who was going through a tough time.She felt her relationship was in turmoil because her finances were tight. As a couple they were having hard time navigating the choppy waters.Understandably, she was experiencing some uncomfortable emotions.As she explained her situation in detail she told me about a wonderful affirmation she had created to help her out with her situation. Yet when she spoke it, I could tell by her body language that there was a part of her that didn’t believe it. I knew she was still locked in judgment of her situation.
How many times have you tried to gloss over something that is really bothering you for a rosier, prettier outlook? I’m certainly guilty of that.I know from personal experience that you can have the loveliest affirmation in the world, but if you have judgment underneath it, you can write it, memorize it, and sing it but it wont make a bit of difference.
So how do you know if you have judgment? If you are stuck assigning a “right” or “wrong” to a situation or find yourself thinking about how things “should” be, you are in judgment.If you find yourself there, don’t worry! We are human, after all.Forgive yourself for buying into the story of what’s happening and let the truth sink in.
The truth is the events in our life and our relationships don’t define us. We can have bad days, bad years, and speak words that we don’t really mean to our spouses and it does’ t make us terrible people. They don’t change who we are at our core. For my friend, and for everyone, the truth is we are all doing the best we can at any given time.
After I coached my friend and she cleared up the judgment that her husband should have made a different decision and that her finances defined her as a person, she was able to create a statement that was free of any false beliefs. She acknowledged her discomfort and dug in to see what it was really about. She was able to free herself from her story.
This time when she spoke the words of her affirmation she took a breath and relaxed. She finally KNEW it.There is a subtle difference between thinking and knowing and before she was just saying the words without believing it. She was keeping her statement in the realms of her mind.
Think about it, it’s only when you truly know something to be true, that it becomes true!
Affirmations are a wonderful tools to align you with what you are looking to create, but you can’t bypass what’s going on underneath with beautiful words.If you have an affirmation for your business, relationship, or life, my encouragement to you is check in to make sure you truly believe what you are saying. If there are any judgments you are harboring, make sure you clean those up.
By letting go of all the stories you are telling about yourself or situations you can align yourself with the truth and make room for miracles to occur.